Ramón Laureano may not have liked it. The league may not have like it. And normally, I don’t ever condone fighting in baseball. But I do condone this technique. The confidence. The embrace. The A+ angle of an ass that’s been perfected from a career of squatting. It’s working juuuusst fine for me.
(this list is in no way exhaustive)
50 Places Dustin Garneau Can Wrestle Me to the Ground
- A cozy mountain chalet.
- A roadside motel during a thunderstorm.
- A field of wildflowers.
- The dock of a secluded lake.
- Any penthouse.
- A desert island beach.
- A private Malibu beach.
- Even a not so crowded Galveston beach.
- Honestly, is there a boardwalk to hide under? Any beach.
- The treehouse of his childhood home.
- An old barn loft.
- Behind the bleachers at our high school reunion after lo these many years.
- The gazebo from Sound of Music.
- A tropical bungalow.
- A tiny Paris flat in the shadow of the Eiffel tower.
- Amidst the fog on the grassy Cliffs of Moher.
- Below deck of a yacht headed for international waters in the madness of fleeing U.S. jurisdiction for the crime we can never undo.
- The stacks in the library at my alma mater.
- At the House of Healing in Minas Tirith as we recuperate from a harrowing journey.
- A wagon full of hay.
- The parlor of an English manor house.
- The first colony on Mars.
- A probably haunted house that was left to us in a distant relative’s will.
- A dilapidated house in Tuscany.
- The overgrown vineyard next to that house in Tuscany.
- The log cabin we built ourselves as we settle the Great Plains.
- A cave.
- The upper room of a Saloon.
- A lighthouse in Maine.
- Basecamp on Mt. Everest during an unexpected blizzard relying on body heat for survival.
- Any of the bridges of Madison County.
- The pottery studio from Ghost.
- On a catamaran.
- In the middle of Stonehenge to enact some mystical ritual we don’t fully understand but are compelled by nonetheless.
- Beneath the Aurora Borealis.
- A greenhouse.
- Aboard the TARDIS.
- A hidden room after an evening of distant though palpable flirtation at Venetian Carnival.
- The top of the Space Needle.
- The rafters of an empty theater.
- The office of the P.I. investigating me for the untimely death of my husband.
- A houseboat in the canals of Amsterdam.
- An abandoned bell tower.
- The unfurnished suburban home we’ve just moved to because we’re ready for the simple life.
- The Captain’s quarters of a pirate ship.
- An enchanted birch forest.
- The single room Henry David Thoreau lived in on Walden Pond.
- A Grecian isle where goats outnumber the locals.
- My holding cell just before I’m burned at the stake for our illicit affair.
- On the field of the Oakland Coliseum.
Let me know when’s best for you, Dustin.
- / 9 hours ago
It's Week 3... and the computer didn't pick Chris Herndon this time