With Sunday soon upon us, I, like most, begin dreaming of football. My Vikings are heading to Arrowhead where they will take on a more than likely Mahomes-less Chiefs squad. I could write for hours about the hottest team in the NFL and how they have rattled off 4 straight wins and look like Super Bowl contenders but I would rather pay our foe some respect and focus on the stellar team they have built.
Even without the reigning MVP, Patrick Mahomes, the Kansas City Chiefs have a stacked roster. Through smart drafting, good coaching, and shrewd trades, they have become one of the powerhouse organizations in the AFC. An organization built around high character guys. A place the rest of the NFL can look to as a moral authority in a sport often lacking one. Sure, they drafted Kareem Hunt despite what they knew about his past but they quickly cut bait once video evidence surfaced of him being a complete garbage person.
Kudos to them and their swift action.
With visuals like that surfacing, no one could justify continued employment. Luckily they had a strong locker room full of standup members of society to get them through these difficult times.
Once they jettisoned the monster that was Kareem Hunt, the Chiefs committed to rehabilitating their organizational image and immediately traded with the Seahawks for phenomenal pass-rusher Frank Clark. Sure, in college he was arrested for hitting, choking and throwing his then-girlfriend around a hotel room in front of her two little brothers while he was under the impression she was pregnant, but she wasn’t! So no big deal.
A great acquisition for a defense that desperately needed pass-rushing help and no video of this altercation exists so it’s very easily forgotten. I mean, he also may have lashed out at a female sportswriter, Natalie Weiner, on twitter for just doing her job but that’s hardly a pattern of abuse towards women! Have you seen how he gets off the edge?? Nothing to see here, a fine addition.
Regardless of whether or not you think Frank Clark is a walking piece of shit who shouldn’t be anywhere near a football field let alone actual humans, the Chiefs already had a strong locker room that could handle these types of players with checkered pasts.
If anyone can relate to Frank it’s phenom wide receiver Tyreek Hill. The two surely bonded over shared experiences.
Hill had his own run in with the law during his collegiate career where he choked and punched his pregnant girlfriend in the stomach. I can see the two of them now, at their lockers, reminiscing about their college glory days. The clearly not terrible Hill was also accused of breaking his girlfriend’s son’s arm in the past year. Yeah, there was damning audio where he was generally being the worst person on the planet but fear not, additional audio came out that apparently exonerated him!
Personally, I thought the second clip that surfaced only made him seem more guilty but lucky for us all the NFL knows best and reinstated the persecuted star. The Chiefs then went on to give him a well earned extension. I know I sleep much better now that the Chiefs, Goodell and the brilliant PR minds behind the National Football League have everyone’s backs. Again, nothing to see here.
I’m really glad we got this all cleared up and can welcome this coming Sunday with zero guilt, concern or trepidation. Clear consciences for all. I, for one, cannot wait.
PS: Fuck Frank Clark.
PPS: Fuck Tyreek Hill.
- / 2 days ago
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