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The Patriots Did This One Thing Years Ago And It Still Works Today

Why doesn’t everyone do this?

Gillette Stadium by Amy Meredith is licensed under CC BY-ND 2.0

The Patriots Did This One Thing Years Ago And It Still Works Today


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Estimated Reading Time: 2 Minutes

The Patriots are in their 8th straight AFC Championship game. If they beat the Kansas City Chiefs, it will be their 9th Super Bowl since 2001.

What I don’t understand is why don’t more teams do what the Patriots are doing. It’s clear that the Patriots have done one clear thing that’s led them to this unprecedented success. You would think more teams would want to do it as well.

That thing?

Draft Tom Brady.

I’m serious.

Why don’t more teams draft Tom Brady? It’s pretty simple and straight forward. It’s not hard and requires little to no effort.

All these teams have to do is draft a Quarterback in the 6th round of the NFL Draft who is slightly below average fitness wise. Who also has little to no positive notes from NFL scouts.

Then, when playing the New York Jets, have their middle linebacker knock out the current starter out of the game. This will give the Tom Brady quarterback an opportunity to play. Before you know it, the team who drafted Tom Brady will be in the playoffs and everyone will forget what Bledsoe, or whoever the current starter is, did for the team.

It also helps if you have Tom Brady date some ridiculously good looking women as he discovers his own personal looks. Definitely make sure he dates an actress on Blue Bloods and gets her knocked up, only to leave her for an international super model.

It’s extremely important that this Tom Brady has his own personal trainer, who’s sketchy as hell, roam the sidelines during games. Even give him his own facility on Patriot Place, which should be the name of the mall the NFL team’s stadium is adjacent to.

I mean this is why the NFL has been so poor performance wise lately. None of the other 31 teams are smart enough to draft a Tom Brady. Despite it being the easiest thing in the world. It’s definitely easier than finding the answer to 1+1. Or even writing the name Tom on a piece a paper.

Imagine how better the NFL would be if there were more Tom Brady’s. More extremely talented, good looking quarterbacks who just seem to win, despite being on the wrong side of 40.

Oh, I almost forgot. If these teams do draft a Tom Brady, which they need to do, they also need to make sure he takes an endorsement deal with Uggs. Why? Because they look incredibly comfortable.

I could keep harping on this. It’s extremely clear that the way to the AFC Championship is having a Tom Brady.

It’s silly more teams don’t do it.

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