Immediately after Mario Fernandes scored the equalizer for Russia in the 115th minute of their quarterfinal with Croatia, I texted “COLLUSION” to as many people as I could possibly think of who would potentially be watching the match. Behind the scenes here at The Turf, we were chatting as the game unfolded in our “Writer’s Room” group chat. Boy were there some absolute gem comments. As we were watching the match separately from wherever we’re located, I joked that I was going to simply copy and paste our chat as my next post. Which I’m obviously not going to do… Nope. Not doing it. Oh, you want a peek behind the scenes? Okay, cool! Sorry, not sorry y’all!
Thank you all for helping this post write itself
“I feel about as bewildered as the Croatian goalie” – Katie Pierce
“How did that not go in? COLLUSION” – Andrew Mark Wilhelm
“That goalie was touched by a Russian orthodox angel” – Meg Schneider
“Ball is magnetized. Opposite to the posts.” – Meg Schneider
“Look, on the Idiot Abroad episode where Karl goes on the Trans Siberian railway he meets a Russian man who is magnetic, sooooooooo could be factual” – Justin Colombo
“I just got to a tv for the second period of extra time at a bar in Newport, RI. Only a few people rooting for Russian, but they are ROOTING for Russia. My man with the Russian flag painted on his face just took several laps around the bar chanting ROOS-SEE-AH” – Matt DaSilva
“I hate PKs. Also, Russian celebration is WEAK” – Ben Salus
“Oops, Putin for got to re-calibrate those goal posts” – Ryan Kelly
Then we got to an exchange that legitimately had me laughing out loud at the bar
Me: How quickly does the Russian coach disappear if they don’t win?
Michael Patrick Trimm: He “misses” his flight home tomorrow morning
Andrew Mark Wilhelm: I’d be more worried if I was the guy who shanked the PK
Justin Colombo: He’s dead. 100%. Already in witness protection.
Meg Schneider: Do they have witness protection there?
Ryan Kelly: “Witness protection” is a little different there than ours I imagine
Michael Patrick Trimm: “Yes please come wit us. Ve are going to take you somewhere very safe dat no one knows ver so the uhhh bad people cannot get you.
What can I say? We have fun.
Seriously, though. Writing for this site with this group is a joy. You should do it, too. Join the fun.
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