Estimated Reading Time: 5 Minutes. Time flies when you’re having fun!

Coming at you a little into the afternoon, it’s Sunday Morning Musings! I’m your host, Ned Donovan, and here to play “what the hell happened this week in sports that we should probably talk to you about” is…..literally everyone? This was a huge week. Lots of thoughts from Turf writers, and myself, and without further ado, let’s get into it.

Xander Bogaerts is really good at Baseball

Yes yes yes, I know, a professional athlete being really good at their professional athlete-ing. *snore* But did you watch that Red Sox game yesterday? Because good God. A 2 run double to negate an early 2 row deficit, and then this tall jack grand slam in the 2nd.

That thing was launched into the stratosphere. You couldn’t ask for a more perfect pitch, swing, or connection. Last year I made this (semi-joking) bold prediction for the MLB season:

For the first time in history, the AL MVP is split between two people, as Mookie Betts and Xander Bogaerts combine for the greatest season in Major League history.

Well Xander and Mookie are batting .371 and .345 respectively. They’ve combined for 33% of the team’s hits thus far this season, and 39% of the team’s extra base hits. Don’t sleep on them, because this bold prediction (and heart felt desire from a Red Sox fan) may be coming back.

Andrew Wilhelm: Cristiano Ronaldo finally did it

Last week Zlatan made his entrance into the MLS with an incredible nearly half field goal. On April 3rd, Cristiano Ronaldo laughed and said “cute, bro.”

CR7’s goal against Juve makes Zlatan’s look like child’s play. It might be the most beautiful goal I have ever seen.
Andrew Wilhelm

He’s not wrong, this thing is absolutely stunning. A masterpiece of physical ability. This is some FIFA 2019 shit right there. Enjoy.

But if you’re like me, you’ve seen this before. No, not a bicycle kick that pristine, but an attempt by CR7. So without further ado, here are some other attempts he’s made at this feat.

That’s why they say practice makes perfect!

Conor McGregor is actually insane

It used to be cute, this crazy irishman who gave no f**ks, about your thoughts, needs, or wants. He was a hard-nosed guy who would kick the shit out of you without remorse. He went up against Floyd Mayweather and held his own surprisingly well. He was good for a great deal of sound bites.

Then he did this.

I have this weird disconnect with many sports, which has to do with the concept of assault. Like football, I get it, it’s in the game. Hockey, I get the hitting but as soon as the gloves come off? I’m confused. That’s not part of the sport in any way that leads to victory of more goals than the other team. Baseball? Actually makes no sense to me. When it’s all over there are usually people being like, “he’s just a really passionate guy and today his passions got away with him.” Like, no. You assaulted someone. If I charge the water cooler because Terry is being a dick about the spreadsheets he’s passing me in my office, I get fired and probably arrested for assault.

The UFC has already released promotional materials showing alternate angles leading to questions about if this is staged. I have no doubt in my mind that Conor McGregor will fight Khabib Nurmagomedov before the end of the year. Let’s not forget that this is criminal behavior and definitively assault.

NEXT

Mike DiGiammarino: Just waiting for the week to end

You know those moments where you think “okay, this week is a loss. Let’s just push through to Monday.” That’s where Eric Hosmer is after an extra inning fielding gaff that gave the Houston Astros a needed win, and the San Diego Padres a lot of egg on their face. Check this one out.

Wooooofffffff.

Kevin Morin: Philadelphia has two playoff teams?

With the Flyers’ resounding win over the Rangers, the Flyers are heading to the playoffs! Yep, the Flyers who lost 10 games in a row have rallied, and with Grioux scoring a hat trick, are in the mix for the Stanley Cup. Will they have an easy road? No. They’re starting with the Penguins, so may God have mercy on their souls. However, it is exciting to see the Flyers returning to the playoffs just as the 76ers are proving themselves to be a team to be reckoned with in the NBA. I’ll have another article on that later this week. Turf Writer Kevin Morin offered this disbelief:

If the Flyers win this game Philly will have two playoff teams. Wut.
Kevin Morin

So true, Kevin. So true.

Andrew Wilhelm: Someone give Gabe Kepler a hug

Rich Schultz / Getty Images

Gabe Kepler might be having the worst/strangest week any manager has ever had. Especially in their first week with a team.
Andrew Wilhelm

What does that even mean, Andrew? Oh. Let’s let ESPN explain it real fast:

  • In the season opener, he removed starter Aaron Nola after 68 pitches while he was throwing a shutout and then watched as five relievers blew a 5-0 lead.
  • He brought in a reliever who hadn’t warmed up in the bullpen.
  • He blew through 26 pitching changes in the first five games, although one of those was infielder Pedro Florimon.
  • He got burned when he brought right fielder Nick Williams in very shallow against Amed Rosario, who hit a two-run triple for the go-ahead runs. Williams was playing the hit chart but look where he was playing:
  • A Phillies player told FanRag Sports that, “We’ll be OK. … We just need the manager to get out of the way.”
  • Kapler was then booed at the Phillies home opener.

Can we all get Gabe Kepler a hug? He needs it.

And for our sendoff? America.

WHAT IS MORE AMERICAN THAN JAMES PAXTON GIVING NO SHITS OVER A BALD EAGLE LANDING ON HIS SHOULDER? That dude has ice in his veins. Ice.

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