Pro sports are still up in the air in the middle of this pesky pandemic. Miss seeing the players you love? Me too! Wish there was a way to get them on TV without jeopardizing the health and safety of athletes, coaches, trainers, doctors, groundskeepers, clubhouse staff, referees, cameramen, catering, transportation, facilities, and all of their families? There can be! I offer these pitches for superior programming that pose but a fraction of the risk of returning to game play.
Bakers vs. Lakers
Professional bakers showdown against completely inconspicuous 7ft. competitors in the ultimate pât à choux-down. Losers go home.
Rays of our Lives
Kevin Cash’s evil twin, Raymond gets a nose job, and Carl Crawford returns after years in seclusion.
Niners Drive-Ins and Dives
Small, local favorites are tasked with feeding the entire offensive line. And you thought Guy could eat.
Sparks and Rec
Just your average local municipality with world-class glamazons getting governance done.
The Bearsfoot Contessa
Jeffrey’s gonna be surprised when he gets home. Ina’s been doing every last goddamn thing in the house for years though, so honestly, she deserves the break.
Players take a riveting look at the invertebrates of the Potomac (Congressional and otherwise).
Sorkinesq repartee – gloves off.
Under the exotic Nassau County sun, 20 of the beefiest bachelors on two blades must learn the difference between lust and love.
Exactly as much medical experience as Dr. Phil, 25x the unnerving male energy.
Saturday Knights Live
No big changes. It’s SNL on ice.
Sox and Friends
It’s just four hours of them talking about whatever they want. Very low overhead. Very high risk.
Still in early stage development: The Titans Games, Iron Chiefs America, Celtics Women, Xena: Warrior’s Princess, Kings of Queens, 30 Rockies, Friday Knights Lights, Twins Peak, Ducks Dynasty, Blues Planet, Sharks Tank, Chicago Fire.
- / 10 months ago
To me, Rachel Nichols is the personification of posting a black square on Instagram.